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Barry Bonds Press Conference - The Musical letra
Mr. Bonds, Mr. Bonds Have you ever taken steroids?
"I'm really getting tired Of these baseless allegations
I'm just a normal guy trying to make a living
I never took a steroid in my life"
Did you take HGH?
"No"
Trenbolone?
"No"
Or testosterone decanoate?
"No"
Insulin?
"No"
Flintstones chewables?
"No"
You never have used performance enhancers at all?
"Yeeeaaaaaaaaah…"
What about all the people who swore they saw you take them?
"They are all just jealous because I am so awesome
It's just a big conspiracy
Perpetrated by racists
I never took a steroid in my life"
Did you get acne?
"No"
Lose your hair?
"No"
Uncontrollable fits of rage?
"NO!!!!!"
Have your testicles shrunken in size?
"No"
Any side effects from the hormone they give to cows?
"Moooo…"
What about your mistress and the house in Arizona?
(Whinny) (clop clop clop) (snort)
"How can she be my mistress
Since I mysteriously lost my sex drive?
I never touched that woman in my life
She's just a really good friend
Who helped pick up my prescriptions
I never took a steroid in my life
And now I have to go
If I can fit my head through the doorway
I never took a steroid in my life"
Paul and Storm - Letras
- A Better Version of You
- Anything But Paris
- Barry Bonds Press Conference - The Musical
- Better Off Dead
- Boolean Love Song
- Buffett Night (Tonight, I'm a Parrothead)
- Chick and the Dictator
- Christmas Eve Eve
- Count To Ten
- Cruel, Cruel Moon
- Dexter the Credit Debt Badger
- Elvis Died Today (On the Occasion of the Anniversary of the Death of Elvis Presley)
- Epithets
- Every Man Has a Secret
- Extremely Old With You
- Find the Words
- George Mason
- Grandma's Christmas Dinner
- Happy Birthday, Kristi
- Here Come The Dinosaurs
- Here's Looking At You
- Hippie with a Djembe
- Hot Monkey Love
- I Will Sing a Lullabye
- I'm Gonna Blow Myself Up
- John Mellecamp's Theme From 24
- K-R-I-S-T-I
- Lame Monster Party
- Lil' Guildies Theme Song
- Lindsay
- Live
- Lose the Gonads
- Me Make Fire
- Mel
- More Than Two
- Mother's Day Song
- Mr. Safety's Bowling Alley
- My Fantastic Plastic Girl
- Nugget Man
- Nun Fight
- Oh, No
- Old Keith Richards
- Opening Band
- Other Places Jimmy Hoffa Isn't
- Other Places Jimmy Hoffa Isn't
- Other Places Jimmy Hoffa Isn't
- Other Places Jimmy Hoffa Isn't
- Randy Newman's Theme From Citizen Kane
- Randy Newman's Theme From Scarface
- Randy Newman's Theme From Seabiscuit
- Randy Newman's Theme From The Lord of The Rings: The Return of The King
- Randy Newman's Theme From The Passion of The Christ
- Shake Machine
- Six Guys, Ten Teeth
- Soccer
- Strip Club Daddy
- Tap Three Times
- Ten Finger Johnny
- That's the News of the Week
- The Ballad of Eddie Praeger
- The Ballad of Rufus Amos Adams
- The Ballad of the Sneak
- The BarryTones' Musical Summary of the News of the Week
- The Captain's Wife's Lament
- The Deballers
- The Easter Song
- The Miranda Lullabye
- The Paul and Storm Theme Song
- The Way-Too-Early Christmas Song
- Those Enron Boys
- Too Friggin' Hot
- Uncle Puffy
- You Just Don't Get It, do You?
- Your Love Is (Love Song With Metaphor)
- Your Town
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